Friends, Part Two

A whole year since the last post I made on that - rather unbelievable - and a lot of things have changed in terms of that. I lost a lot and gained a few, it's a back and forth game.  My opinions have changed slightly on it, too. I no longer harbor a grudge against those who want a lot of friends or who have it. The circumstances could be different, it's not always the same reasons, nor is the content of their friends necessarily relevant. Let me clarify. The nature of the relationship shouldn't, the intent or motive of why friends are friends shouldn't matter, but who their friend is. At least, that should be more of the focus. But on to real matters.

I'm not above communicating or gaining such relationships any more because I can gain something from everyone, whether it's knowledge, insight, or even some influence or financial gain. As long as it doesn't get personal. As long as certain..... boundaries aren't crossed. I have my personal crowd - which is a select few - and I have my business crowd (not literal business, but in how I regard them).

Also, whenever it seems I want to give up on the game, someone comes along and changes my mind. Just when I lose all hope in you silly humans, I get a reminder that you all aren't as hypocritical, stupid, arrogant, ignorant, emotional, and narrow-minded as I thought. Most are, but some aren't. I think once that personal barrier is breached, it's hard to go back and sometimes, losses are incurred and things just need to..... end. But I don't believe it will always have to be that way. Okay, it's crap to say people don't change and that people do change, because both are true, in a manner of speaking. I feel I have changed a lot, especially since part one of this, but at the same time, I'm still the heartless, "confident" (although some may use other less endearing terms), smart, and logical bastard I was then. It's hard to say, especially when emotions and feelings get involved and I thought that I could get away from all that, reap all the rewards and incur none of the downsides. Things don't work like that. What's the phase, can't live with them, can't live without them. I need the realness, the absence of bullshit that I get from nearly no one.

Conclusion: whether you like it or not, you need friends, you need that closeness, it's all very necessary towards living with any kind of fulfillment. It's just picking the right people to have that with. Thankfully, I think I'm starting to get it and starting to choose the right people.