One thing that will always elude our understanding, is dreams. To dream. Even the word as a fantastical sounding to it. Now, as it stands today, it is the mind (in this post, by "mind", I mean the subconscious) trying to understand the thoughts, events, feelings, and emotions that have happened, throughout the day. And everyone likes to dream. To "experience" things that would, otherwise, cause you harm, if you ever did them in real life. Or a new angle on a memory. Or just the remembering of a memory, as it stood. So many different things can come from dreams. So many things can happen. Some of which bears thinking about, to understand exactly why such things happened, in that dream. Others, they are just mindless indulgence in things we can't have (violence, sex, or anything that isn't that, but equally..... disturbing).
Now of course, on the flip side, we have nightmares. My understanding is that, it is the conscience is punishing you for what you have done. Every time I hear the phrase "This is so I can sleep at night" (or some variations of that), I think. The mind is so great, it can literally cause you to not rest, just because of some ill deed you have done. Isn't that extraordinary?!
I had this ongoing nightmare, for months. I can remember it, even after all these years, so vividly. For months, almost every night, I dreamt that I was standing in front of a white house. It had a beautiful garden across the whole front of it. A bricked walkway from the door, to the sidewalk. It was at the end of a street, with another street running across the front of it. Beautiful neighbourhood.
As I stood directly in front of the door, looking upon the neighbourhood, a huge semi-truck was roaring towards me. Frozen in fear, I could do nothing but look on. At the second it got to me, I ducked, dodging under its huge lift.
Then, I wake up, quaking at the events.
It only stopped, when I finally stood my ground. Hit by the truck. Woken up again, except I woken up from that dream, for the last time. To this day, I still don't know what evoked it.
Dreams can open our minds to such things that we can't see in the real world. Allow us to get out our dark thoughts, without reprecussions.
Yet we still have no grasp on what propels them, or makes them be.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
The Human Zoo
Recently, I was in a Wal-Mart (for those of you who don't know, it's a corporate supermarket, to the max). Now, I hate being around more then five people at a time. So, you can imagine my displeasure at being around near 500 (estimate, could be wrong), at the same place. Normally, I would be an "in and out" kind of thing. I always seen going there as a bad thing to revile at. But, this time, I saw but an opportunity.
I was with a group. They wanted to go, I needed a ride, certain concessions had to be made.
Anyway, I just wandered for a few hours. Not even gazing at the products. I was watching the people. Here, you could see the great American capitalist system at work. Bumbling fools, going from one aisle to another, in search of the next vanity item. People who go shopping without even the slightest idea as to what they are going to buy. It's funny this great race, we rose from the shackles of primitivity, to... this.
As I wandered, I tried to imagine the mindsets of these people, now and afterwords. But, I couldn't. And as I watched, I couldn't help but to notice:
These types of markets, they are nothing more than, what I call "human zoos". A place where you can see people in their natural habitat, many and varied different individuals. Where you don't get scorned for watching. Completely oblivious to the world around them. I imagined that I could shoot some in the one of the corners, move on to the next, and they would be none the wiser. I know, they would be surprised at such a happening. But, still, if you have the "itch", this would be the best place to get scratch that itch.
With their carts. The fat ones on motorized scooters, the built-in cart packed with more food items. All the vanity items.
Brings me to my next point: what the human race needs, is another epidemic. Or some kind of alien invasion (which is doubtful, so epidemic it is). A virus created by an experimental testing facility. Say, fatal symptoms don't appear until a week later. What if, in a week, one person contracted thousands. And those thousands, contracted millions. What if a quarter of a billion people, died in the same week, of the same thing? Panic would ensue. Such unimportant strife and boring actions would turn to trepidation.
We need another one of those. To remind us of what is really important, in this existence.
I was with a group. They wanted to go, I needed a ride, certain concessions had to be made.
Anyway, I just wandered for a few hours. Not even gazing at the products. I was watching the people. Here, you could see the great American capitalist system at work. Bumbling fools, going from one aisle to another, in search of the next vanity item. People who go shopping without even the slightest idea as to what they are going to buy. It's funny this great race, we rose from the shackles of primitivity, to... this.
As I wandered, I tried to imagine the mindsets of these people, now and afterwords. But, I couldn't. And as I watched, I couldn't help but to notice:
These types of markets, they are nothing more than, what I call "human zoos". A place where you can see people in their natural habitat, many and varied different individuals. Where you don't get scorned for watching. Completely oblivious to the world around them. I imagined that I could shoot some in the one of the corners, move on to the next, and they would be none the wiser. I know, they would be surprised at such a happening. But, still, if you have the "itch", this would be the best place to get scratch that itch.
With their carts. The fat ones on motorized scooters, the built-in cart packed with more food items. All the vanity items.
Brings me to my next point: what the human race needs, is another epidemic. Or some kind of alien invasion (which is doubtful, so epidemic it is). A virus created by an experimental testing facility. Say, fatal symptoms don't appear until a week later. What if, in a week, one person contracted thousands. And those thousands, contracted millions. What if a quarter of a billion people, died in the same week, of the same thing? Panic would ensue. Such unimportant strife and boring actions would turn to trepidation.
We need another one of those. To remind us of what is really important, in this existence.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Too Much Insight
Okay, this might be a bit personal, but if you can read this, then I guess I gave you permission.
People always talk about moods. Good moods, bad moods, silly moods, funny moods. It's just mood, mood, mood. And if it "ain't" happy or funny, it's generally seen as a bad mood. I can see why. But, to say that all is bad, that's broad and too vague. Example time! Say, when I'm in a good mood, I tend to act... differently, obviously. Although I am unaware of my obvious change in behaviour, later I usually become repulsed by my words and actions, under such a state. Okay, that was vague. I'll try again: In school, I always strived to be in what others would call a "bad mood", which really didn't mean I felt bad, it's just in a giddy, happy mood nothing can get done. Simple psychological science. While others would see "What's his problem?", I merely thought of nothing but the work. Sure, I had to force it, sometimes. For the necessity.
That's my main problem with "happy" people. They are so irrational, caught in the single thought of having fun.
In conclusion, to be in a good mood, those moments should be few and far between.
People always talk about moods. Good moods, bad moods, silly moods, funny moods. It's just mood, mood, mood. And if it "ain't" happy or funny, it's generally seen as a bad mood. I can see why. But, to say that all is bad, that's broad and too vague. Example time! Say, when I'm in a good mood, I tend to act... differently, obviously. Although I am unaware of my obvious change in behaviour, later I usually become repulsed by my words and actions, under such a state. Okay, that was vague. I'll try again: In school, I always strived to be in what others would call a "bad mood", which really didn't mean I felt bad, it's just in a giddy, happy mood nothing can get done. Simple psychological science. While others would see "What's his problem?", I merely thought of nothing but the work. Sure, I had to force it, sometimes. For the necessity.
That's my main problem with "happy" people. They are so irrational, caught in the single thought of having fun.
In conclusion, to be in a good mood, those moments should be few and far between.
Last Resort
Now, I'm going say some good things about the human race (for a change). There is this inherent resilience. From looking at a particular problem, with a solution which is either not hard to figure out, easy, or, especially, a long way away, people tend to ignore it, move on as if their "intelligence" is insulted by pursuing the immediate action, or the simplest one. I can't be say this without admitting falling prey to this logic, many times before. But, when backed into a corner, when shown that there is only one absolute recourse, humans rise to the challenge. Hell, I've done some things I didn't quite think I was capable of, under the guise that there is only one solution and there was no way around it. Just very recently, I have had to change. To "accommodate" as it were. Become the opposite of what I thought I was. And you know what? Didn't seem so bad. Actually, I quite enjoyed (and still am enjoying) the experience of it all.
In fact, that's how I like it. The mental block that exists (and I am, assuredly, not the only one with this problem), it fades when backed into a corner, when faced with a last resort. It forces you to throw away the nonsense that existed in your mind before. It forces to show some gall, do the impossible (although which is usually the most probable, you just don't know it at the time). But, given a choice, it offers less of a.... visceral response. Delayed, thoughtful, which I have come to find, is actually very bad, sometimes. Such delays can cause the problem to grow to absurd proportions, so the new problem is bigger than the original.
In conclusion, I would prefer when there is only one action. Especially if that actions is the I desire. Erase the doubt, and move forward.
Or else, stay still, and hope you don't get hit.
In fact, that's how I like it. The mental block that exists (and I am, assuredly, not the only one with this problem), it fades when backed into a corner, when faced with a last resort. It forces you to throw away the nonsense that existed in your mind before. It forces to show some gall, do the impossible (although which is usually the most probable, you just don't know it at the time). But, given a choice, it offers less of a.... visceral response. Delayed, thoughtful, which I have come to find, is actually very bad, sometimes. Such delays can cause the problem to grow to absurd proportions, so the new problem is bigger than the original.
In conclusion, I would prefer when there is only one action. Especially if that actions is the I desire. Erase the doubt, and move forward.
Or else, stay still, and hope you don't get hit.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Cosmic Logic
Fate. Pre-determined path. Never-ending cycle. Is there really a choice? "Everything happens for a reason" why must humans always try to answer everything? As intelligent beings, we should move past this foolish notion. Funny how they say things like that, then insist we should leave everything else alone. As if some benevolent will judge us, and accordingly, dole out either reward or punishment. I think these people must be purged. Or enlightened. But these people can't be enlightened. Stuck in their primitive beliefs, as if it means something. Or maybe it's so they don't have to take responsibility for their own actions.. In any case, it's a rot. WE choose our own path. WE have advanced our society, in spite of these knuckle-draggers who would wait out the "Rapture" and deny progression, because "God says so". Or maybe religion is just an excuse to do whatever they please, in the name of some benelovent (or malovent, but those don't exist anymore.... or at least I don't think so) deity.
I know it's a bit depressing to look at the grand scale and realize that the hourglass is draining. But if you can accept that and move past it, our society would advance so much, if nothing else then to find immortality. It is our duty, as the logical and above average intelligence THINKING people, to lead (or manipulate, whatever works) them into an ascended stage of their own being. More than entertainment. More than carnal desires. More than "I just want to shoot something today". More than "Dude, let's get hammered". More than gold. More than credit. More than anything they will be, by themselves. Let's just hope that someday will get leaders who realize this. Who move past simple material greed. To achieve.
'Course it's just something you have to be born into.
I know it's a bit depressing to look at the grand scale and realize that the hourglass is draining. But if you can accept that and move past it, our society would advance so much, if nothing else then to find immortality. It is our duty, as the logical and above average intelligence THINKING people, to lead (or manipulate, whatever works) them into an ascended stage of their own being. More than entertainment. More than carnal desires. More than "I just want to shoot something today". More than "Dude, let's get hammered". More than gold. More than credit. More than anything they will be, by themselves. Let's just hope that someday will get leaders who realize this. Who move past simple material greed. To achieve.
'Course it's just something you have to be born into.
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